best wine you can buy at target
I spend so much in Target, sometimes I look at my bank statement and think, someone stole my ATM card. Then I realize, Oh, shit. That was actually just me, three times last week. Target knows what's up. They entice you with brightly-colored plastic and seasonal cups that will either: A. break or B. get lost -- probably within a week of purchase. And that's just the tip of the skillfully-crafted, Orla Kiely-iceberg. Target has devised ways to steal your money -- like some kind of commercial conglomerate ninja -- all while making you think it was your idea. You're going to need a muffin, too. Technically, this isn't Target. You're going to need sustenance. Also probably a muffin or some other baked good. This is a scam because A) The caffeine is going to hype you up and make you forget how much money you set out to spend and B) The muffin sugar is going to reduce your defenses. You are now out $8 and the caffeine-induced mania will make you stop at the Dollar Spot. 2. The Dollar Spot.
Not everything in the alleged "Dollar Spot" is a dollar. Some of it is actually $3, and it's always the shit your children want most (i.e., Hello Kitty baskets). Even if everything was a dollar, that pricing is only as good as your self-restraint. Twenty-seven dollar spot items is (in case you are times-tables rusty) $27, plus tax. You now own 27 pieces of carcinogenic Chinese crap (no offense, China). And you're $27 poorer ($35, counting the Frappuccino). These bastards are always changing their notepad selection. Every time they stock the shelves with a new color Moleskine or a spiral-bound pad with inspirational/witty text, one falls into my cart. Never mind that I have 17 notebooks at home that have three pages of notes them. Never mind that the last notebook I bought is now a coffee coaster/paperweight. They are just so cute. Especially all stacked together with absolutely nothing whatsoever written in them. The "your house is hideous" aisle. I don't even really know what this aisle is.
5. The end cap black hole. Would you just look at this? Never mind that I don't have an inch of wall space. Never mind I don't even really know what this is. It has a hobnail glass jar and it's aqua.
chocolate shop wine buy onlineAnd for the love of all that is holy there is jute. I'll put flowers in there. $29 (plus tax and another $5 notebook).More like Hot Steals. Oh, these look innocent enough. They're just Hot Wheels. I'm mean, they're only a DOLLAR. You already spent $3 on the Hello Kitty basket, anyway. It's all fun and games until you realize you have 74 Hot Wheels. More like Hot STEALS. I.e., four packages of Oreos = one gallon free milk. Do I need four packages of Oreos? That's not the point. The point is, if I see a get-something-free sign, I'm sucked in. It's the Dollar Spot lie with less cancer from China, or the end cap black hole with more cookies. You're going to need this.
By now, you've made it three-quarters of the way around the store. You're definitely going to need some wine to dull the shock of the pillows you bought that you so didn't need. Probably more than one bottle. Buy six, get 10% off (also see #6). They sell vodka too. I don't know what happens to my ability to reason when I get to this section of the store. This is Target's master plan. First, they exhaust you by making you walk their Triwizard Tournament labyrinth. Then, they assault you with the heavenly scent of lavender. My feet hurt and I'm tired and a nice mineral salt soak sounds pretty necessary. And you can't have a soak without the matching scented lotion. Home stretch, you think. This can go one of two ways: If you have kids with you, they are going to beg for candy/Teddy Grahams/Goldfish. This is going to be annoying, but also distracting in a beneficial way. If you can manage to get out of there without buying candy/crackers/cookies, then you've probably also avoided the sample size section to your right.
If you haven't avoided the sample size section, you now have yet another Eos lip balm and lotion. Now, do what any self-respecting woman would do. Rip your receipt into a hundred tiny pieces, go home, uncork that wine and run yourself a heavenly lavender-scented bath. , an alternative news+culture women's website. 3 Pricks In 3 Minutes: The AshleyMadison Experiment Why It's Time To Banish Mommy Guilt Raising Teens Doesn't Have To Be A Nightmare Sold by Gelid Coolers and Fulfilled by Amazon. Fulfillment by Amazon (FBA) is a service we offer sellers that lets them store their products in Amazon's fulfillment centers, and we directly pack, ship, and provide customer service for these products. Something we hope you'll especially enjoy: FBA items qualify for FREE Shipping and . If you're a seller, Fulfillment by Amazon can help you increase your sales. We invite you to learn more about Fulfillment by Amazon New (1) from $14.97 I Like Long Romantic Walks at Target Funny Wine Glass 15oz - Unique Gift Idea for Her, Mom, Wife, Girlfriend, Sister, Grandmother, Aunt - Perfect Birthday Gifts for Women - Evening Mug
FREE Shipping on orders over . DetailsLuxury Combed Cotton "Bring Me Some Wine" Socks - Perfect Hostess or Housewarming Gift Idea… FREE Shipping on orders over . DetailsBath Bomb Gift Set USA - 6 Vegan All Natural Essential Oil Lush Fizzies. Organic Shea and Cocoa… Compare to similar items Funny Mom Juice Wine Glass - Mothers Day Gift, 17oz I DO YOGA - Just Kidding... I Drink Wine in Yoga Pants Wine Glass Procrastidrinking Funny Novelty Wine Glass - 12.75 oz. - Gag Gift - Humorous Red or White Wine Glass for Mom, Women, Friends, or Her - Made in USA I'm Not Slurring My Words. I'm Speaking in Cursive. - 16-Ounce Etched Wine Glass by Lushy Wino Funny Stemless wine glass, perfect for Bachelorette parties, 15 oz. C & M Personal Gifts CAUTION: Drinking wine from this glass may cause one to take a road trip to Target!Ever ask yourself "I need a wine glass that fits my shopping style?" This wine glass is the perfect choice after a long, rough day or a humorous start to enjoying a drink with friends.
This wine glass quote will ring true with most avid Target fans and start a conversation of laughter and jokes.The wine glass makes drinking your favorite wine, red or white, vino, spirits, or adult beverage lol funny guaranteed!An affordable wine gift solution:Thinking of a unique gift idea can be daunting task. The Romantic Walks wine glass gift is an inexpensive present or wine accessory for any wine lover or enthusiast (men or women):Whether you need a 21st birthday gift or 50th birthday gift, Christmas present, stocking stuffer, housewarming gift, hostess gift, wedding or anniversary gift (his and hers mr and mrs), girlfriend gift, gift for your parents (mom and dad), best friend, sister, daughter, novelty gag gift, retirement gift, or bachelorette / bridal shower gift, we've got you covered.Rest assured our hilarious wine glasses are ready to gift wrap, packaged in a box strong enough to ship. Just click 'Add to Cart' for your hassle-free gift giving experience! 3.2 x 3.2 x 4.2 inches
0.8 ounces (View shipping rates and policies) 5.0 out of 5 stars #3,573 in Kitchen & Dining (See Top 100 in Kitchen & Dining) #19 in Kitchen & Dining > Bar Tools & Glasses > Bar, Cocktail & Wine Glasses > Wine Glasses #86 in Kitchen & Dining > Wine Accessories #177 in Kitchen & Dining > Glassware & Drinkware If you are a seller for this product, would you like to suggest updates through seller support? Would you like to tell us about a lower price? See questions and answers 5 star100%See all verified purchase reviewsTop Customer ReviewsValentine's gift! (Believe it or not)Cute wine glassShop Till You DropFive StarsLove It!Love it!Shop-a-holic BFF will LOVE this glass!Extremely happy with my purchase See all customer images Most Recent Customer ReviewsSearch Customer Reviews See and discover other items: cool wife gifts, gifts for mom funny, unique gift for mom, unique gifts for sister, gifts for moms birthdays, aunt birthday